Tuesday, December 12, 2006

The Strange Case of Disappearing Foreign Office Ministers

Yesterday the Conservative requested an Urgent Question on Iraq via The Speaker. William Hague expected he would be up against the Foreign Secretary Margaret Beckett. The Speaker was happy to accept it but was then embarrassed to find out that not a single one of the Foreign Office Ministers was available to answer it. Margaret Beckett, Kim Howells and Geoff Hoon were all abroad and Ian McCartney was unwell. It was decided that to avoid embarrassment all round that they would reapply today.

Today it emerged that Kim Howells was in Washington, Hoon in Berlin and Beckett in, er, Plymouth. It seems that Mrs B is back in London tomorrow and would be able to fit a fleeting appearance in Parliament in her busy diary then. Mr Hague thought otherwise and decided to rouse Ian McCartney from his sickbed. I wonder what on earth the Foreign Secretary has been doing in Plymouth which has prevented her from appearing in the House of Commons for two days on the trot?

31 comments:

Serf said...

No doubt it involves a caravan

Anonymous said...

Negotiating the secession of the Scilly Isles?

Wrinkled Weasel said...

Ruth Kelly always has this mona lisa smile on her face that broadens occasionally to a maniacal grin.

Is she wearing some kind of internal electronic ecstacy management syestem?

Anonymous said...

I understand that her caravan was clamped by the council for illegal parking.

Anonymous said...

"Yesterday the Conservative requested an Urgent Question on Iraq via The Speaker"

Well, thats bollocks - you can only request an UQ on the morning it would take place.

Clueless.

Anonymous said...

We've been making some important investment decisions.

http://www.shopcreator.com/mall/plymouthcaravancentre/topic/topicmenu-1.stm

Anonymous said...

Watching Des Brownes reply to William Hagues questons on Iraq, I can inderstand why becket and co are absent.

Tony Blair is in limbo over Iraq until he has some idea wich way Bush will jump.
They simply can not answer any questions on this issue without the say so of the US.

This will take a while as Bush obviously does not like the report from the ISG, this is evident as he is now asking for different opinions on Iraq hoping to find some suggestions that fall in line with his current plans.

As for Des Browne the phrase "thrown in at the deep end" springs to mind.

Vlad the Impala said...

I think any future pay increases should be linked to attendance in the House. That's what they're paid for, in case they've forgotten....


Perhaps Margo is XMas shopping for the caravan

Anonymous said...

Well, there's some nice caravan sites down that way...

Anonymous said...

Well, you know how slowly these bloody caravanners drive ...

Anonymous said...

Well a caravan would resemble the retreating coalition forces as they exit the soon to be Iranian province of pikey terrorist muppetstan.

Cowards, evry single last one of them. How the F**K can they be within 5% of the Tories???

Shameful

Anonymous said...

What difference does it make?
We don't actually have any form of foreign policy to speak of other than to ask Bush what his plans for Iraq are.
President Blair and his kitchen cabinet controls what's left of UK foreign policy. Beckett et al are ciphers, just there to give a semblance of cabinet government and to respond to questions with vapid generalities.

Anonymous said...

Dont they have any concept of the internet or mobile telphony in the house of commons?

Man in a Shed said...

Is Plymouth the new Coventry ?

Little Black Sambo said...

Ruth Kelly's ecstasy management system is the barbed wire knickers issued by Opus Dei.

Anonymous said...

"two days on the trot" - Iain, you naughty boy. you'll be asking for the truth "from the horse's mouth" next. i bet she'll bridle at that. who's taking the reins while she's away. how dare she saddle des browne with this. trust you to stir-rup trouble though.

Anonymous said...

Hague's the best. Shame he's a Bildeberger and a europhile, and so keen on his own brand of fudge.

If his strategic sense was equal to his debating skill, Cameron would be surplus to requirements. Give Hague a target to attack and he drops artillery all over it. Ask him to work out where the target is, though and he's mystified.

Becket's building a bunker in Plymouth...Hague and Cameron are too strong for her.

Anonymous said...

How the F**K can they be within 5% of the Tories???

Same question, same answer:

Why vote for the soggy cardboard imitation of a collection of stupid leftwing policies when you can vote for the real stupid leftwing policies?

(By the way: 5%? You're an optimist. From the latest I've seen, they're now neck-and-neck. If that's the mid-term situation, we can "look forward" to another Labour landslide next GE. It's JUST NOT GOING TO WORK, Windmill Dave.)

Anonymous said...

If she's in Plymouth she's probably visiting one of the largest military shipyards in the UK, Devonport Dockyard, but then you'd expect that to be Des Browne's job...

Anonymous said...

Perhas Brown and Beckham's mum will be swopped like Blair did recently with the two incompetent Home Office Ministers?

Talking of the Home Office which the Audit Office says hasn't got a clue about how much money it's got or spent, des that make it still unfit for purpose? Which of his predeccessor Labour ministers does John Reid blame for this state of affairs before he's off on his search for somewhere else to be totally useless while mouthing meaningless soundbites?

Anonymous said...

Of course Hague and Cameron are too strong for her. She's a socialist 10th rater and it is deeply shaming that she has been put in a great state of office that is much, much, much, too big for her.

Anonymous said...

Plymouth? On her way out or back in to the country?

Anonymous said...

verity how can you talk of hague and cameron in the same breath? one is a moderately successful after-dinner speaker with a degree of consistency and respect, the other is a complete &&&&.

Anonymous said...

anonymous 9:26 pm. I can see your point.

Anonymous said...

In that photo, Margaret Beckitt looks as though she is standing as a town councillor. Responsible. Assured. "charming and confident in a pink suit", even, she and her husband, aka "tax-payer passenger", think so - but only because their bar is so low.

Her whole horrible look in that photo is so dated. Yesterday's socialism, yesterdays' responsible headmistress of a junior-school-in-the-community look. Dated. Gone away. Paid for, of course, by people who get up early in the morning, get dressed, have breakfast and face the battle of getting to work either by driving or by Britain's third world cattle car public transport.

This ignorant woman (how many languages does she speak, btw? At least French, surely?) is the last gasp of the ZaNuLab regime. I do hope "our" Foreign Secretary speaks fluent French?

Let me reinforce the question: Does Margaret Becket speak fluent French? I want to know the answer to this question, because surely it is unthinkable to be a British Foreign Secretary without fluency in at least French, and probably German or Mandarin as well is unthinkable? Presumably she has these qualifications?

Regarding her background, where did she study European history and to what degree level?

Where did she study world history and to what degree level?

I think we need a justification for promoting this trashy individual to one of the great offices of the British state.

Ugly, stupid, ignorant, miniscule horizons yet got catapulted out of her pen onto the world to represent our country because there was no one else.

No sense of style, no social graces except a showing of the teeth and a hee-haw. A good contestant for trailer trash TV.

ZaNuLab is bereft. The poverty of socialism throughout the last century. But they don't give up, because there are always hundreds of thousands more resentful inadequates than there are wealth producers.

God, I hate these people.

Anonymous said...

If you didn't hear Beckett being given a good kicking by Jim Naughtie this morning, I suggest you use the BBC 'Listen Again' service for the period from 8.10 am.

Best bit was when Becky was asked whether things really were better in Basra now than 6 months ago. She said they were, due to the hard work of our brave soldiers etc. etc.

JN then asked if that was the case, why had our staff over there packed their bags and decided to come home.

Great stuff. Will be interesting to see how they paper over the fact that no Iraq policy exists in the UK until Dubya has decided what his is, and that apparently has been bumped until 'early next year'.

Anonymous said...

There are a few good plastic surgeons down that way i believe. Maybe a quick nip and tuck in time for xmas? Btw Iain, saw you on newsnight last night, your voice is deeper than i imagined!

Sir Pointon said...

What Anonymous said. She was presumably AWOL yesterday doing her prep for the interview this morning. Naughtie destroyed her anyway.

Sadly, her humiliation was all ours. Our military doctrine is that we will never fight a war without the Americans. In order to profit from that doctrine we must frequently lick American boots. It's called the Special Relationship.

Anonymous said...

jh - A plastic surgeon is only a secondary concern. She needs a brain transplant.

Does anyone know whether our Foreign Secretary speaks a second language? God, she makes me sick.

Anonymous said...

This repulsive liar is a symbol of everything that is inept and 10th rate about tony blair's "mind". He's never seen a bandwagon he wasn't eager to board.

This appointment of Becket was motivated, I am certain, because blair thinks in clichés, frankly, by Mr Bush's appointment of Condoleezza Rice as the American Secretary of State. The missing X factor, of course, is that Ms Rice was not a politician and was already a powerful achiever and major success in her own right. Not with the help of a political party. She is a concert pianist, she was the rector of Stamford University when Mr Bush and George Schultz spotted her. She had never been a party apparachik and had no interest in politics. Compare and contrast with beckett. Never had a job. Never had an achievement. Promoted for being a loyal suck-up. Deeply stupid. Lies on TV. Apparachik.

Anonymous said...

when will you get this right? it's Stanford