Sunday, June 03, 2007

Quotes of the Day

"My regret is my inability to believe that Man is intrinsically good. It is so much easier and better rewarded to be bad. Jeffrey Archer, Jonathan Aitken and on and on. How they spring back. Just say, 'Yes, I did it' and you're offered your own chat show. What a shameless age we live in" - Actress Maureen Lipman.
"I could, yeah. No, don't put that in! God! Not me" - Tory MP Boris Johnson when asked during an interview if he could imagine having sex with the Prime Minister's wife, Cherie.
"People have been prepared to give David Cameron huge leeway for what he is doing to modernise the party, but they feel the price does not have to be selling our souls" - Conservative MP Derek Conway.
"If I start to go senile, hand me a plastic bag, because I'd rather end it all quickly than spend my last decade watching daytime telly in a room reeking of boiled cabbage and stale urine" - TV pundit Janet Street-Porter.
"It's a great time to be a petty criminal. If you get sentenced to a year or two inside, the chances are they'll send you home with a slapped wrist rather than lock you up" - TV's Eamonn Holmes.
"When the day comes, I'll probably be clinging to the doorknocker, but so far I think I can just... let go" - The Prime Minister looking forward to his departure from 10 Downing Street.
"Texas singer Sharleen Spiteri and Prime Minister-to-be Gordon Brown have now earned new reputations. Spiteri is the woman Scots would most like to see nude and the Chancellor is the man who they most want to keep his clothes on" - Scotland on Sunday reports on the findings of a poll about nudity among 1,700 Scots.

18 comments:

Anonymous said...

Maureen Lipman is a disillusioned New Labourite, so she does what others of her ilk do, attack Tories that have already been stuffed and mounted.

Anonymous said...

a woman wants one man to satisfy her every need.
a man wants every woman to satisfy his one need.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

Boris would **** anything evidently.

David Anthony said...

You missed this gem from Tony Blair's "respect czar":

"I hate the fact that everything is gloomy, everybody is sleeping with each other, everybody is killing each other, everybody is committing anti-social behaviour all the time."

A shame she was talking about Soap Operas...

Anonymous said...

Aren't scotsman like Gordon Brown born with a full set of clothes?

Anonymous said...

I don't "do" Janet Street Porter.

Anonymous said...

Lipman will stick with New Labour so long as they follow the neo-con agenda

Anonymous said...

Janet Street-Porter needn't put a plastic bag over her own head...there would be plenty of volunteers to help her at any time - day or night.

Rich Tee said...

That Blair comment reminds me of what Verity said a few months ago: "They'll have to pry the key out of his cold, dead hands."

As for that respect "czar" she sounds like a conservative. These people had the cheek to call DC a chameleon.

Graeme Archer said...

"People have been prepared to give David Cameron huge leeway for what he is doing to modernise the party, but they feel the price does not have to be selling our souls" - Conservative MP Derek Conway.

No need for Mr Conway to sell his soul. Surely we the taxpayer are always ready to cough up for any extras he or his immediate family need? Absolutely I need to read lessons in political sense from Mr Derek Conway.

Maureen Lipman is like Jeremy Hardy in drag. She hasn't noticed that the anti-Tory schtick that got her talentless backside through the 90s (that, plus those ever-so-useful ads for the leviathan, Tory-privatised BT -- no sign of her conscience then, quelle surprise) has long gone. Like Hardy, she'll end up on some subsidised R4 panel show, ranting away about Thatcher as the few listeners left shake their heads in bewilderment.

Anonymous said...

I notice it is only old Tories she goes on about - she seems to have forgotten all the New Labour chumps. Oops they forgot to say sorry, and still keep their jobs - no honour in that lot - but that's OK - they are Labour - I always admired Lipman, till I heard her describe Isreal as 'that poor, small practically defenceless country', or words to that effect.
Now she is just another self opinionated, self serving labourite...
Josephine, Eastbourne

Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...
Boris would **** anything evidently

You've either never read Freud or live in denial of the rich fantasy and subconscious life of human beings - possibly both. Boris was asked if he 'could imagine' it - not if he would do it.

Anonymous said...

The woman I would most like to see nude is KEELEY if you voye for me here CLICK HERE I have the pics....

Anonymous said...

Anonymous:11.24.

I don't know how you're mind works, but the stars, ****,actually meant read, as in, " Boris would read anything evidently." As for Freud I would heartily recommend," The Psycopathology of Everyday Life",where Freudian slips such as yours are lucidly explained,

Sea Shanty Irish said...

RE: the unmistakable desire of Scots of all classes & conditions (shared south of the border I'm sure) that Gordon Brown keep his pants one, can only say that one of the Naked Truths of Politics is this: physical beauty is NOT an asset in an election, but rather a hindrance.

Why? Because we are conditioned to regard beautiful people as stupid, untrustworthy, pretentious, you name it – “pretty boys” and “glamour girls” are some of the nicer things said about them. Of course this is mostly a reflection of the envy the less favored of us feel towards them. Not that we don’t want to hang out with the beautiful people, and lure them into compromising positions: we most certainly do. But we aren’t all that included to vote for them: just ask Ségolène Royal.

From US context, note that our most beloved president was ABRAHAM LINCOLN a man so ugly his supporters insisted he grow a beard to hide his face, and whose opponents (some inside his own cabinet) called him “the original gorilla” and worse.

Now some of yez will point out that JOHN FITZGERALD KENNEDY was a very handsome man, who certainly had no trouble getting a date (to put it mildly). BUT note that JFK barely made it into the White House with one of the narrowest margins in US history; if he’d been less photogenic believe he’d have won a lot more votes.

So the fact that Gordo is less pretty than Tony is a plus for him, not a minus.

Anonymous said...

Interesting post by sea shanty Irish.I think times have changed,though(and not for the better).

douglas clark said...

Shaleen Spiteri is hot.

Gordon Brown is ....